Down the garden path

In the 'Olden Days' - let's say up until the early 1950's - it was common practice for cottagers to keep a pig or two down the garden. The pig often formed part of the wages for a farm labourer; it would be 'given' in spring, fattened throughout the year and killed before Christmas. It would take three days to "put the pig away" with the immediate and extended family benefitting from good food throughout the long winter months.

Lucky the man who had a sow which regularly gave birth to a litter: his income could be bolstered by selling a weaner "down the garden path" to his neighbours.

The pig was a treasured element in the rural economy. My trips to market with our Provisions are greatly enhanced by the numerous pig-tales and incidents which the 'older' generation love to relate: there cannot have been many rural families which did not have a much-loved pig. And not just country dwellers: my own mother is happy to regale us with the story of her younger brother riding the family pig before school every morning (much to the consternation of my grandmother) and that was in the outskirts of a city, and in Germany! Small wonder that so much porcine terminology is embedded in our language: pig-headed, hog-tied, happy as a pig in muck, telling porkies, lucky pig, silk purses from sows' ears.......

Unfortunately, the practice of selling the pig "down the garden path" has long been outlawed - not least through changing tastes and Government regulation.

However, the habit of going "down the garden path" is far from dead"!

Delila's Little B's, such a quiet stay-at-home bunch until just a week ago, have brought a totally modern interpretation to the old phrase!

Having finally found their way out of Delila's confined homestead they rapidly tired of the immediate surrounds: even the driveway and its verges soon lost their appeal.

On my way to pick apples in the orchard last Friday afternoon, I chanced across Linda who asked:

"How far are you happy for the piglets to roam?"

In saying which she looked down towards the field where the horses were grazing.

"Funny" I replied "I couldn't find them this morning when I took the dogs for a walk and assumed - after looking hi and lo - that they must, after all, have been piled up in the corner of their ark out of sight!"

But clearly they were not.... for there they were, plain as day, running around between and

among the horses, trotting up to see all their aunts and uncles and cousins, popping in to the chickens en route and then, with a sudden "whoops" of realising they were perhaps a little far from home, off they all scampered through the dense rusting leaves - back to Mum. Since when it has become a common sight: piglets mooching along the garden path in front of the house, down the path beside what used to be a rock garden and via the path past the summer house via the top of the orchard and down the track to the field........

And just yesterday, perhaps tiring of going down all our paths, they decided to go down via the bridleway path to say "hello" to the bantams in front of the garage and to Ginger and all the chaps at that end of the Reserve grounds.........

"Where next?" I ask...... I suppose there is always the path up to the Village........

Now, that would give the neighbours something to talk about......

It's a Good Job we've got Gunner to round them all up and see they get to their Proper Place at the end of the day (or any other time, come to that).....

Busy, Busy, Busy

The year may be winding down for winter but here it's all go, go, go!

The clock's gone back, the nights are drawing in, Halloween's been and gone (heralding

the annual 'pumpkin marmalade making' season) and it's almost Guy Fawkes' night........ Mark, our smiley butcher, has just won a Silver Medal for his Mangalitza sausages and his wife, Mandy, won Gold with pork pies made with Mangalitza meat.... what could be better?

Well, according to Andromeda and her sisters, not the weather! It's absolutely perfect - mild and damp - for rootling, a sentiment seemingly shared by all the pigs at the moment.

They really didn't like the dry hot bits of summer (not that there were too many of them) when their noses and trotters became bruised and sore on the inpenetrable ground. Pigs are just far happier in the soft and splodgy mud.......

Despite the unseasonably warm spell, the maiden aunts in the woods have grown the most wonderful curly coats, a consequence of which is that they are spending most nights sleeping under the trees and stars, the confines of their ark presumably proving far too warm.

Delila's latest brood, meanwhile - the Little B's (so named 'cos they were born on the eve of The Big Boss's Birthday!) - have just started venturing out, having been uncommonly stay-at-home for their first few weeks.

"There's piglets on your drive!"

Said a neighbour when he drove down this morning.

"Did they look healthy?" I replied.

"Very" said he.

"Good" said I.

Well, what else is there to say?

Driving back from town yesterday afternoon I myself was surprised by the sight of the 10 Little B's milling around under the trees scrumping chestnuts and whatever else their little snouts could dig up - busy, busy, busy: I had to smile: startled by the sound of the car, they looked up, squealed and scampered back to mum! It really is the most amusing thing......Truly free range pigs!

When we can tear ourselves away from all the fun of the farm, The Bestest Gundog in all the World and I have returned to our favourite winter occupation.

We're working on the same three shoots as last year and it's been heartwarming to get back

with the 'old gangs' and catch up on all the news of summer: who's fished what, who's won prizes at the flower/veg. shows; who's been where and built what: who's lost an old dog or got a new one.... so many tales to tell between the drives. And then on the drives - the anxious moments of wondering if The BGiatW will listen to the familiar commands (always), respond to the new ones learned in the summer (joyous - almost instant response to "Over" to flush the ducks on the pond), peg the not-yet-flying-pheasants (only one, but still despair) and will his nose be still as keen (better than ever when he retrieved the well lost duck). Such a joy to work with and he so eager and happy to be doing what he loves best. Who could not delight in a working springer spaniel doing his job so well........

And talking of jobs to do: there has been the on-going marketing of the Pork Provisions. Fortunately for us, the Smiley Lady known as Lucy kept up our presence in the Market place whilst we were away on holiday - for which brave effort she was dubiously rewarded at one event by torrential rain which poured all day and soaked her and all the wares and, worst of all, kept all but the hardiest customers away - but was she downhearted? Nope.

"All part of the Adventure!" she exclaimed................... still smiling......

But,this past weekend, she finally succumbed to a cold so it was my turn to go to the local town market on Saturday - not particularly good business done: not many people about.

"This market used to be so full of traders" remarked one lady as she wandered past with her son. She bought nothing. From anyone. Perhaps that's why market traders stop turning up?

Then off to another local town's Victorian Market on Sunday - great crowds, great atmosphere (complete with Morris Dancers), lots of dressing up and lots and lots of business done....... the lows and highs of markets all in one weekend.

And whilst some of us are having fun, frolicking in the fresh air, The Big Boss is busy co-ordinating people, pigs and products for the growing hotel trade, our new direct-delivery service and the forthcoming Christmas season..... there truly never is a dull moment

Then.... and Now

"It's been a wonderful spring and summer....if just a little stressful.... endlessly looking after all these roly poly chaps, keeping them in some sort of order and trying to see that they stayed in roughly the right area. Going for long walks every day was OK too, if not very challenging. Most days She Who Must be Obeyed made me go through one or two Lessons but it wasn't like the Real Thing.

It's even been quite relaxing just pootling about and keeping an eye on the poultry and playing with Pilot and Cat....

but I couldn't help thinking about The Real Job and whether we'd ever get back to it again. Then She Who must be Obeyed and The Big Boss went away for ages and it was all jolly confusing.

More Squealers arrived and needed keeping in order and we had Linda to look after while she was looking after all of us..... and then I got shut in the big barn for hours and that was all jolly worrying..... But then She and the Boss suddenly came back from their long hunt in the middle of the night and today, Joy of Joys, we were out with the old Pack doing what a dog loves best of all...... I could tell She was anxious -

probably thought I was going to run riot - which, to be honest,I could have done out of sheer excitement - but I was that pleased to be out hunting again that I thought I'd best behave. It wasn't the busiest day and She kept telling me to "Heel" but, what the hell, Now we're back hunting again who cares..... ??? I'm a happy chap and She seemed quite cheerful too....."

The Boar with the Biggest Smile

Mangal's been going around all week looking like the Cat that's got the cream.
Why?
Well, as of last Friday, he's got a new wife!
It must have come as quite a surprise to him 'cos all his life he's only known Ginger and they're as settled as Darby and Joan.
I was of the opinion that he was getting a bit long in the tooth for romance and wouldn't take too kindly to a new mate. Boy, was I wrong!

He's 4 years old and mustweigh 250 kilos but when Cherie was introduced to him the years and the weight just dropped away and - after she'd taken a few minutes to check out her surroundings and meet the new neighbours - they were all over each other.
In no time he was proving that he is a boar in the prime of life and far from the sleepy old chap we've grown used to!


We decided to leave them to it!

"Poor old Ginger" Linda exclaimed. But actually, although she did glance in Mangal's direction to see what he was up to, she was soon tucking into her tea without a care in the world. Her next litter is due in November so no doubt she's happy to be back in her own space without The Old Boar telling her what to do all the time.

As for Mangal....

within 24 hours it was clear that Cherie was the boss but he seemed quite happy with that..... in fact, he seemed quite happy with everything......

So ???

"OK you guys - what's going on?
I'm not entirely wet behind the ears you know? I thought we were beginning to see eye to eye yesterday. I've been sitting here keeping an eye on you, you know. I saw Ritz disappearing off into the other field earlier when he thought you were all going to descend on him again like yesterday and nibble his toes. And he's a very tolerant chap most of the time.

Now look around - there's that bunch of brothers over there in the middle of the New Chickens' pen, staring at the world as if they've nothing better to do.

Then there's that other bunch over the other side of the Chicken pen making like they're in some sort of digging contest..... It's not on, you know. You two stand here and look me in the eye and say it's all under control... but what's under control? Not you lot. Certainly not the chickens. Poor things. They're jumping around all over the place - they've never seen chaps like you before - no wonder they're not doing the laying thing. And you know what? I'm the one getting all the flak from Her who Must be Obeyed for jumping in there and running around when all I'm trying to do is keep you in order.
"Not suprised your mum looks the other way when you run off. If a well trained fellow like me can't keep you in order, what chance has a poor old sow got?
"What? Me? Insult your mother. Never.... but she doesn't stand a chance against you lot.
"Hang on though - maybe I've an idea. Perhaps I'll speak to H-w-m-b-O about giving you some whistle education....... That really would be something. Teach you lot to help me with my work and we could all go hunting together..... Wouldn't that just scare the feathers of those pheasants???

Here we go again.....

"So, I'm sitting here thinking to myself :

'Here we go again.... another lot of chaps who just want to wander all over the place.'
"Ever since I was knee-high to a piglet's eye I've been told how to behave and what I can and can't do. Her-who-must-be-obeyed is very strict on a chap minding his P's and Q's.
"Yet with these little guys Mum doesn't seem in the least concerned... just carries on eating as if there was nothing in the world to worry about.

"Come to think of it, she doesn't have to worry - it's not her who has to round them up from the bottom of the field or the top of the yard..... Don't think even Her-Who-must-be-Obeyed realises just how stressful it is keeping them all in order....There must be a better way....."

"So, let's see if I can have a little chat with them... nose to nose... (actually it's a bit too much 'in your face' with so many snouts at once) maybe we can agree a few ground rules.... after all, there's got to be some order around the place. I can't stay here all the time - more important things to do... Can't have this lot thinking they can do as they please, whenever they please ....
Let's see if I can't just get them to stand still and pay attention.....








"That's better."

"Right you guys: Pay attention: Here's how it goes. You don't have to stay with your Mum all the time; I know what it's like to be young - got to have a bit of freedom - stretch your wings...
"What?"
"You don't have wings? (funny - always thought that was how you managed to fly around all over the place so quickly)"
"Stretch your legs then.. (little stubby things need all the stretching they can get - wouldn't be any good at all in a thick patch of brambles)

"But every now and then when I appear you've got to form an orderly line and come back here to your pen - all together - not all going in different directions and trying to fool me. I've learned my lessons. I can count, you know...... and I know left from right and back from front and, if necessary, I can even fish you out of the pond....

"So can we have just a little co-operation..... please ... just so I can get a little peace and quiet and curl up and go to sleep in the sun from time to time....?"

"Just like that little guy over there....."

"Think about it, hey? We'll talk about it again tomorrow...."

The heart of the country..

The much awaited rain mentioned in my last blog might have thrilled the piggies but it did nothing but dampen the hearts of other groups of country folk.

"Fair suicidal!" commented our local gamekeeper when - having bumped into him whilst walking the dogs - I enquired how he was.

Seems the rain coincided with him putting out the young pheasants and had so far prevented him putting out the young partridges ... "...and only 5 weeks to go till the Season starts..." he added grimly before continuing on his way.

The farmers were equally grim. No sooner had they started the harvest than the heavens opened leaving machinery stranded whilst crops grew dank and grey. In some cases, the grain became so damp that it started to sprout green shoots..... On our visit to Gavin and Stacey we saw wheat standing in water - "Like rice in a paddy field" commented The Big Boss.

And then there was the Local MFH who, when I enquired about Hounds last week said he'd had them fit and ready to go three weeks earlier but the rain had scuppered his plans to start Autumn Hunting. "We've got to wait for the crops to be in" he said, adding that he'd be out as soon as he had the smallest bit of Country for them to hunt.

Well, it all came good again 10 days ago. High pressure came to stay; the winds blew and suddenly machinery was all over the fields like flies on dung....... from late morning till well into the night their drivers hardly drew breath. Wherever one went, the heart of the country was beating with the rhythm of an Elite Performer: pounding relentlessly until not a single shoot remained standing.

And today the rain has returned.: but most of the farmers are laughing.

Harvest is done: yields have proved exceptionally high: disasters across the globe mean prices are nicely up (for the farmers, that is) and there's just the remainder of the ploughing, drilling and hedging to be done before the tractors and trailers, harvesters and other paraphenalia can be put away till next year. Even the MFH got his way. The weekend after our chat I happened to drive past the Kennels in the early morning mist and saw the yard full of trailers and lorries - a sure sign that Autumn Hunting had begun..... and with it the slow slide into Autumn.............................. Season of mists...................... and long-awaited winter activities......