"What's that?" I asked Himself.
"What?" he asked
"That noise" I replied as the strange sounds continued: the banging turned to dull thumping.
"It's definitely coming from the hall" I said, getting up and walking in that direction, closely followed by The Bestest Gundog. I followed the noise; he followed his nose. We both ended up in the same place. In front of the sideboard. Waifa was there too. Looking, as we were, at........ well, nothing really for there was nothing to be seen. But The Dog's nose and The Cat's nose were both glued to the bottom of the sideboard. I looked over the back and there, tucked in the corner of the shallow alcove behind the furniture, was a cowering baby bunny. Himself moved the furniture a little away from the wall and planted his foot in the gap. The Dog guarded the exit at the other side and the cat the front whilst I sneaked in the back behind the foot....... And quickly grabbed the trembling little creature and took it outside, firmly shutting doors to keep cat and dogs indoors. I released the bunny in the field the other side of the bridleway where I hoped it might have a chance of getting away from further feline (or other) predators!
The next night as I was walking through to the kitchen from the Snug, followed again by The Bestest Gundog, I was overtaken by my canine companion. I wondered at his sudden hurry. On reaching the kitchen I was greeted by said dog coming towards me proudly carrying another young bunny. Behind him was That Cat with a look of annoyance about her. "He's pinched the dinner I bought you" she seemed to be saying!Out went the dinner: it wasn't the same young bunny but even so I took it in another direction and released it. After a few moments to adjust to its unexpected freedom away it bounced.
It's not just that The Cat known as Waifa seems insistent on bringing us fresh meat for dinner (perhaps she thinks we should diversify away from Pork?) she also brings it in through the half-open scullery window. A very determined young madam indeed.
For a couple of days it went quiet. We had guests for the weekend. I was preparing the dinner on Saturday evening.
"Here comes Waifa with something in her mouth" exclaimed one of our guests in slight agitation. "Shut all the doors leading out of the kitchen" I said in equal agitation. Too late. Waifa dropped her gift on the floor. It ran. Behind the sofa. Followed by The Bestest Gundog. Under the sofa. Pursued by the latter's nose. We tipped up the sofa. Mouse ran into a corner. Dog sniffed and Mouse ran off again. This went on... and on.... for a while till finally The Dog caught it and triumphantly brought it to me. The Cat watched in disdain. Our guests were not entirely amused either. Charades before dinner anyone?
That wasn't the end of it. The Bestest Gundog is to be trusted in every situation; he never lies. But he has a handler who cannot always believe that. Anyway, the mouse was caught so the fact that the dog was pointing his nose in the direction of the kitchen cabinet did not mean the mouse was there. It was probably just the scent of it. "He's clearly pointing" said our guest, looking at The Bestest Gundog whose head was clearly tilted to one side, ears obviously alert and stubby tail quivering with anticipation.
Of What? There was nothing there. But our Guests and The Boss would have none of it. "The Dog thinks there is something there?" they all said.
So, down on my belly (how else to look under a floor standing kitchen cabinet?) and removing the facia panel at the bottom I, and my eager canine companion, peer under the cabinet. Actually, he tries to squeeze himself under the cabinet. Still I can see nothing - except loads of dust and dog hair. But the dog sniffs and excitedly runs round the other side of the cabinet. Followed by Yours Truly. Another facia panel is removed and "THERE He's got it!!" everyone yells at me. And sure enough, he had indeed got - another little mouse in his mouth! I think it's beyond a joke but everyone else is amused.
"Told you!" said The Boss, in that annoyingly knowing voice; "The Dog never lies!"
That wasn't the end of it. The Bestest Gundog is to be trusted in every situation; he never lies. But he has a handler who cannot always believe that. Anyway, the mouse was caught so the fact that the dog was pointing his nose in the direction of the kitchen cabinet did not mean the mouse was there. It was probably just the scent of it. "He's clearly pointing" said our guest, looking at The Bestest Gundog whose head was clearly tilted to one side, ears obviously alert and stubby tail quivering with anticipation.
Of What? There was nothing there. But our Guests and The Boss would have none of it. "The Dog thinks there is something there?" they all said.
So, down on my belly (how else to look under a floor standing kitchen cabinet?) and removing the facia panel at the bottom I, and my eager canine companion, peer under the cabinet. Actually, he tries to squeeze himself under the cabinet. Still I can see nothing - except loads of dust and dog hair. But the dog sniffs and excitedly runs round the other side of the cabinet. Followed by Yours Truly. Another facia panel is removed and "THERE He's got it!!" everyone yells at me. And sure enough, he had indeed got - another little mouse in his mouth! I think it's beyond a joke but everyone else is amused.
"Told you!" said The Boss, in that annoyingly knowing voice; "The Dog never lies!"
The following afternoon I came indoors with the dogs to:
"Alan's just seen something small and black, a bit like a slug, but with legs and it ran across the floor and disappeared!"
The Cat's little Joke is wearing thin........
The Cat's little Joke is wearing thin........
"Why didn't you catch it?" I asked, slightly short-termpered.
"Because we're just a little squeamish and towney." replied my guest.
So - The Bestest gundog was summoned again.
And off he went. Round the kitchen, behind the sofa, sniffing here, there, everywhere; following the slug-on-legs' trail through kitchen, dining room, sitting room (because nobody thought to shut the doors!) until he located it behind ------ another sideboard. Which is far too heavy to move. So there the creature stayed. With The Dog's nose firmly attached to the underside of the sideboard. And we all got on with dinner.
"There is is!!!" shouted The Boss, mid-mouthful, making me almost choke on my air-dried ham and melon. At the cry the little shrew doubled back from the path it was about to take across the kitchen to the outside world...... and retreated to the safety of the sideboard again.
Well. The Bestest Gundog stayed on guard. We all continued with dinner. The creature didn't appear again and we all forgot about it.
Some things take precedence over guarding intruders though and Gunner and Pilot both joined me in the pantry whilst I prepared their dinner. It's one of the most favourite times of the day for Gunner. Just as we came out of the door heading for the scullery Pilot's caught sight of something by the kitchen cabinet ---- and off he darted, quicker than I thought he could still dart and, with a sudden scrambling lunge, caught the shrew in the corner just before it rounded it and made the sanctuary of the sideboard again.
I don't know who was more surprised, Pilot or I. Perhaps he was because I said "Drop it" rather sternly and, for the only time in his life that I can remember, he actually did drop it. That stopped me in my tracks! But I recovered just in time to scoop the little beastie up before it recovered from the shock and set off for the sideboard again. And I took it outside and put it in the flower bed.
It's now Tuesday and - I think - Waifa has tired of that little game. It's all gone quiet. The guests have left (not because of the animal antics, although maybe....?) and indoor hunting is off the agenda.
What was that just running across the floor.................?
Well. The Bestest Gundog stayed on guard. We all continued with dinner. The creature didn't appear again and we all forgot about it.
Some things take precedence over guarding intruders though and Gunner and Pilot both joined me in the pantry whilst I prepared their dinner. It's one of the most favourite times of the day for Gunner. Just as we came out of the door heading for the scullery Pilot's caught sight of something by the kitchen cabinet ---- and off he darted, quicker than I thought he could still dart and, with a sudden scrambling lunge, caught the shrew in the corner just before it rounded it and made the sanctuary of the sideboard again.
I don't know who was more surprised, Pilot or I. Perhaps he was because I said "Drop it" rather sternly and, for the only time in his life that I can remember, he actually did drop it. That stopped me in my tracks! But I recovered just in time to scoop the little beastie up before it recovered from the shock and set off for the sideboard again. And I took it outside and put it in the flower bed.
It's now Tuesday and - I think - Waifa has tired of that little game. It's all gone quiet. The guests have left (not because of the animal antics, although maybe....?) and indoor hunting is off the agenda.
What was that just running across the floor.................?
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